Time to play. Starting small in 2018.

Last year I kept wanting to start a poker bankroll challenge and but LIFE kept getting in the way. Sometimes it feels like everytime my life looks like it is falling into place, a curveball hits me and my path completely changes. There are things that I wish I would have done differently but on the whole but last year was a great year of self-discovery for me.

This summer I bought a house in Windsor. I really like it here, it is quiet, people are kind and the cheap cost of living takes away the “money” stress that I was used to when living in Toronto. I plan on staying here for a long time.

This year I want to:

• Help kids in my community
• Exercise regularly
• Eat healthy
• Make small monthly goals

This month’s small goals:

1. Restart this blog. [X]
2. Go to trampoline fitness class ( Jan 9,16, 18, 23, 25, 30)
3. Focus eating a healthy breakfast every day.
4. Eye test. (I keep putting this off) I’m outta contacts and I’m not letting myself order any until I get this done.
5. Start Pokerstars Spin and Go bankroll buildup

The last couple year’s I’ve barely played any poker. I kept saying I was going to start playing but it just kept becoming not as important as the other stuff in my life that was going on. This year I’m going to work towards being a good “rec” player with a goal of 1000 spin and goes a month. Starting with $119.83 US playing $3 spin and goes, let’s see how fast I can move up stakes.

Good luck to everyone in 2018. ❤

 

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I miss the poker world – My build-up to Vegas/weight loss challenge

So I’ve kept my head down, got my life together and dealt with some depression and anxiety issues and now I feel better than I ever have. Well almost better. Dealing with mental health issues like depression is draining. For me it meant, getting on the right medicine and cognitive-behavioral therapy and disappearing. Whenever I fall into depression I gain a lot of weight. Last year I gained a whopping 42lbs. Crazy I know. My first reaction was to hate myself for doing that to my body, but I don’t. Not even a little bit. I did what was best for my mind and at the time it came with some weight gain. It has given me a goal.

I started my weight loss journey January 1st and I’ve already lost 22 lbs. I’m doing a form of a keto diet + some additional restrictions. Now that I’m in a routine with 0 cheating. I’m adding in my next goal.

A bankroll challenge for myself. Well not really a bankroll challenge, more like a get my ass to Vegas this summer challenge. I’m going to start this with $100 US and play the hero games on partypoker.com .  Why those games? Because they are crazy soft. Throughout my challenge, I am going to be giving myself some tier goals to keep it fun. However, if I don’t lose the rest of the weight I gained (20lbs) by June then I won’t be going to Vegas and that would be a shame.

My first tier goal (I’m calling it the bottom of the barrel tier) is $885 US that would be 7 days/airfare and hotel staying in old Vegas.I’ll be starting this March 1st.

I’ll be starting this March 1st.

My bankroll guidelines will be:

I really just want to bring the reason that I started playing poker back into my life and that is because I loved the game.

I have a lot of other goals that I want to get done this year. I’m adding them in slowly to build up routines but I am pretty sure it is going to be a crazy productive year for me.

7 lbs to Vegas

That’s a pretty straight forward goal and completely doable. As I see people planning their Vegas vacations, I’m getting in gear. I’ve been on a roll health wise and now that it is sometimes only -3 here in Montreal I’m even more motivated to get in shape.

Also now that it is starting to warm up I’m getting out of the house more, in the daylight. Today I went to see Kingsman, there is something amazing about going to the movies in the middle of the day. We walked in and no one checks your tickets, no line up for the snack bar and no one kicking your seat because there is only 4 people in the theater. It is like they just opened the theater for me.

Sunday, I went to Cabane Panache et Bois Nord. If it is one thing they have right here in Montreal, it is the street festivals.

This year is the first year I’ve been away from my family for Christmas and Easter and to be honest, I’m a tad homesick, but I’m looking forward to seeing them this summer. I’ll be visiting some family and friends in Toronto the last week of May, then off to my favorite place.

Last year I had to skip Vegas for unforeseen circumstances, otherwise known as, I did my own laundry, emptying pockets is for suckers. This year I will be treating my passport like… a passport. Because of my lack of Vegas last year I’m going to have to make my trip count by staying a whole month!

I don’t think I’ve gone to Vegas once without doing something incredibly stupid, so here’s to Vegas!

Oh, how I failed, but succeeded at the same time.

I’ve never been the type of person that spent a long time looking in the mirror. In fact, I pretty much avoided it as much as I can.

In 2010 I was incredibly thin. Thin does not always equal healthy and I wasn’t healthy. My anxiety and depression had made me stop eating for days at a time and I was also constantly sick to my stomach. During this time period I was unable to look in the mirror, so I didn’t even know how thin I was.

When I final tabled the Ladies event in 2012, I remember watching an interview of myself and thinking, that isn’t me. They had to of stretched me. Not long after I was at a wedding and I saw another photo that I didn’t recognize myself in. I couldn’t believe how much weight I had gained. At this point I missed my old workout buddy Tina and my old trainer.

It happens to all of us… We wake up one morning and step on the scale. We look down and our stomach turns. We hit our peak weight. We talk to our closest friends and admit the hard truth, have never weighed this much in our lives. Not sure how it even happened.

I’ve lost over 20lbs since moving to Montreal, I’ve changed my lifestyle completely. My favorite food was Pizza, now it is crab stuffed zucchini.  I use to be able to do 2 dozen shots and be “Everyone Loves Drunk Lesley”. Now I have one drink and am “Everyone Loves a Cheaper Drunk Lesley.” It has taken me until 32 years of age to truly see myself when I look in the mirror, but I can now. It isn’t just about losing the weight I gained, it is way more than that. I’ve forgiven myself for failing.

A few months ago I had a slight breakdown. I had taken a test that was to pinpoint my strengths. My results were in a transition stage.  I have spent so much of my life trying to make the people around me happy that it was impossible for me to be. I had made that mistake before and I was doing it again and again. This test was a wake up call for me.  I still had it in my head that who I use to be, was who I needed to get back to being. That didn’t work for me the first time, so why was I putting so much pressure on myself to be her again?

So how are my posted goals for the year going… supernova with $100 bankroll—FAIL. I busted that $100, Be more social—Double FAIL, I’ve only gone out about 2 or 3 times this year. What I didn’t fail at were the important ones. I’ve been eating healthy, following a workout plan and working on my fears. I’m still working on PLO, and have a few coaching sessions to help put me back on the right track. As for going out more and being more social, I can’t really answer why I want that. It is just one of those things that I feel I am weird because I don’t want to. What I do want to do is spend time on my projects that I had put on hold, so that is what I’m going to do.

Finally, back to my true love. Poker… WPT is back in Montreal, April, so I’ll be hitting up Playground to play one or two side events. I’m also setting up my Vegas trip for June. And for the love of the poker gods, please let me not lose 39bbs per 100 in the next 20000 PLO hands.

Can I build a bankroll from $100 and make Supernova?

In my last blog I told you that my goal this year is to make Supernova.

For those that don’t know. That is about 18k in rake. Jan 1st I started this journey with $100 at the second smallest stake. 5PLO following the bankroll management that is posted on donkr PLO From Scratch

So, that makes me stuck at 5PLO until I have a bankroll of $350. I’m also going to include the bonuses I hit and any $ I win playing the VIP Freerolls in my bankroll.

This week went OK. It did start off strong but ended poorly. I didn’t review any hands this week. Next week I am scheduling in 1 hour a day to review my hands.

I have a lot that I am working on right now and I am feel pretty motivated. I’m hoping this is going to be my best year yet!

Happy New Year

For my first blog of 2015 I am working on one of my biggest fears by making it a vblog. Hope everyone has a wonderful, profitable 2015! Bonne Chance!

3 is My Lucky Number

Yesterday, I had my largest live cash. Going into day 3 of WPT Event 3 Montreal at Playground Poker I was sitting 26/28 with a tiny stack. I spent the morning trying to figure out if It would be best to fold my first hand and hope for someone to bust and take a $200 pay jump.

After looking at the positions of the stack sizes, I figured my best play would be to jam a little wider than NES if the first hand was folded to me. I was UTG +1 at a 7 Player table. I looked down at my first hand and had Q8s that made my play pretty easy and I jammed. The reason I picked this spot was simple. The button was a <10bb stack and both the SB and BB had 12-19BBs

Right before the second hand a player busted and we had a table redraw.

I went through the blinds. I was folded to in the BB and I looked down at 58s so I jammed and was snapped off with A5 but I hit a straight.

A little while later I woke up with 99 utg. I raised and was jammed on by the BB. I knew I was in a race, but I was already on a freeroll. My 99 held. Looks like I was going to be playing for a bit and my plans to watch Dumb and Dumber 2 last night would have to wait.

My biggest flaw playing live is I don’t have the experience. I love playing, but I am not good with the chips and I often get confused with my chip stack and raise a bit too large or when players are talking I can’t focus as well. I have only played about 12 – 15 live events lifetime, I know I will get stronger at this in time.

So out of those games why have I now final tabled two events in extremely large fields 7/937 and now 3/1331. The answer is simple before the Ladies WSOP game I had a bit of coaching and I’ve watched a ton of MTT videos from BlueFirePoker. I know what you are thinking, Plug she works for BlueFirePoker but it isn’t it. I don’t get into the situations I have been because I ran well. I have put myself in a spot where I get paid to learn, not many people can say that. I get to watch the videos from Bfizz11, Aaron Been and DDbeast. From watching those videos I have continued to learn how to make my decisions easy and make decisions harder for other players. That brings me to this hand.

Raymond Kay opened from utg to 600K. I 3bet from the big blind. I don’t remember the amount I bet, but I do know that I went bigger than I would normally. The reasoning was simple they have already 3 bet me and 4 bet me light. Eventho I didn’t see the hand, I knew because they kept asking me what I folded. Tip: normally when players ask this without showing their hand, they want the pat on the back for making you fold something better. I wanted to make the play a bit harder for them. I knew that they were bullying me because I folded a few times in some small pots. If they flatted the pot would be big enough that I could go all in on the flop and they should be calling fairly light. If they folded, they would most likely slow down because I changed the game that they had gotten into the rhythm of. Best case scenario was they would put me all in. My play was win-win imo.

So what happened?

Raymond raised 600k. I 3-bet
He pondered for a moment before announcing all-in, and Lesley made the quick call.

Raymond: 7c8c
Lesley: QdQc
5s,Jh,9h,6h,Qs

Unfortunately, it didn’t work out for me, but I am extremely happy with the way I played and ecstatic that I was able to come from 3rd last with a 28 left finish in 3rd for $22k.

What Happens When You Fail?

My diet bet challenge to lose 4% of my weight in 28 days ended the other day. I was close, but not close enough to win it. I have really been loving going to kickboxing classes unfortunately I have to take a break from that and pretty much any exercise I have been doing. Last night my back gave out again, not at kickboxing, not at trampoline class. A single step while walking across my living room caused my back to give out, yeah I run good. For those of you that are counting this is the fourth extremely painful time that my back had given out.

I spent a lot of last night and this morning feeling sorry for myself. How every time life seems to be working out I keep getting kicked right back to the starting line. I know I have a life a lot of people would dream of, but is it so wrong to expect more from myself? Is it wrong to want to be in control? Last time this happened, I was in Physio for four months. Is it wrong to think about how much I could have accomplished in that time? The answer to all those questions is simple. YES, it is wrong. I can’t do anything about it, but work on what is next. Weight wise, I can focus harder on a diet. Work out wise, I am stumped. Open for suggestions.

Unfortunately, this isn’t going to be the last time this happens to me. Once my back is better I am going to go try again and if I get hurt again, I am going to deal with it. The only thing worse than the pain I am in right now would be giving up trying to be the best me I can be.

WPT Montreal starts in a few days and I am excited to go play a few side events. If it wasn’t for this coming to town I would have most likely put off going to the doctor for a few days but I really want to go and play. Scratch that, I need to go and play.

PLO wise, I feel like I have learned a lot pretty fast. My goal this month is not to play a single ZOOM hand. I am going to keep this part of my blog pretty small while I am  trying to learn and until January. That is when my real goal starts. For those of you that missed that post, it is to make Supernova by playing PLO. Add in a positive win rate pre rake-back and you have a goal. I’ve never tried for supernova or played a ton of hands online. I really should have by now, so I’m way overdue.

Hopefully stars does not make crazy changes to VIP system.

So, What happens when you fail? I start again.

I Am Stronger Because I Post

Every time I post I feel stronger, in control, motivated, but most importantly I feel hope. I normally post after I feel sad, not today! This last month has been amazing. From visits from my family, hosting a Halloween get together last night and working towards my goals. Every puzzle piece seems to be fitting into place even if I have to force it. I feel healthier, stronger, but most important I am happy.

My first weight loss challenge is almost over, with one week to go I have stopped losing weight the last little while. I am not sure if it is because I have been working out and have gained from that or if my diet is missing something. I am going to be working my ass off this next week, hoping to still make my goal. I guess it is time to step up that Cardio as well as going to my kickboxing class. I was fairly good with what I ate the last few weeks, but I could still improve on my healthy meals. 

Last night I hosted a Halloween Masquerade Party and had a well-deserved cheat day, even as a cheat day I still paid attention to what I was eating as I didn’t want to go crazy and ruin the work on myself that I have done.

Still being fairly new to Montreal and I don’t know that many people. This made it more important to me to share a fun night with the amazing friends that I have made so far here in Montreal. Halloween is my favorite time of the year and that made it the perfect time to invite them over.

WPT Montreal is coming to Playground Poker in November. I am looking forward to playing two side events. Event The Wild $150 with a 100k guaranteed and the $250 Frenzy a 200K guaranteed prize pool.

This next month my main focus is on my health, losing weight and getting toned. Secondary focus will be working on my PLO game and third will be a creative activity for my mind that is yet to be determined, any suggestions?

If anyone has some healthy tips to help me with my goals or PLO please share them with me or if you post about how blogging has helped you let me know so I can follow your blog.

The Start of A Better Me

My emotions have evened out and I am getting back on track. In fact, I’m better than on track. I’m motivated. One of the things that I am told a lot is that I work harder for everyone else than I do for myself and without having someone that needs help I tend to get lost. I’m not talking about things I get paid to do. I’m talking about favors. What people don’t grasp is that people that help people, do it all the time and it is exhausting and not exclusive to their one request.

I remember every single time I’ve lost it on someone at work. One time I was at work and an account supervisor came into the studio with a request at 4:30 that they wanted done that night. After saying no, which is something I didn’t normally do, He went over my head to my boss who came out asked me to figure out a way to get it done. I was on salary, meaning I didn’t get paid past 5pm so what I was doing was basically a favor. When I passed off the work around 9pm to him, he said to me it is only one night. I was furious! I looked him straight in the eye and said “For you it is only one night. You only work for one client. I work with every client that passes through this agency. Don’t you think the same thing happened yesterday at 5 and will again tomorrow at 5 with a different account rep? Today was the day I took a stance and it didn’t work out for me.” That was also the day I knew I wanted to quit my first full time job. I wish I had, but I didn’t. The economy was really bad at the time, friends and family said I needed to find a new job before you quit. I never had time to look for a new job, I was too busy doing all these favors. Had I quit when my mind told me to, I would still have the drive I had at the time. My life goals would have been easier to achieve.

Instead, I waited until I needed to quit because I was broken and all my drive was gone.
My last job was also in Advertising. The only reason I quit that job was because I don’t have a passion for advertising and I didn’t want to live my life repeating the same mistakes over and over.

My goal is simple, I want to be the girl I was before I got sick. The girl that was extremely driven. I know she is with me, it is just a matter of time before I’m back hitting my full potential. Finding the me I want to be has been hard. I get small glimpses here and there and I have hope that soon I will be on top of my game.

I went to my first woman’s only kickboxing class today. What was amazing about this class and gym was the atmosphere. Everyone at the H2o MMA was working on their own personal goals yet the minute you entered you felt like you were on a team. I am going to be committing myself to going to this class twice a week for the next 3 months to help me towards my fitness goals. I will continue taking the trampoline fitness class once a week, just to mix things up a bit. This is a step in the right direction. Taking these classes will help me to be motivated and build confidence. Those two ingredients will make achieving my life goals easier.

I have also been working on my poker goals and I think they are going well, I will update on that soon.