Time to play. Starting small in 2018.

Last year I kept wanting to start a poker bankroll challenge and but LIFE kept getting in the way. Sometimes it feels like everytime my life looks like it is falling into place, a curveball hits me and my path completely changes. There are things that I wish I would have done differently but on the whole but last year was a great year of self-discovery for me.

This summer I bought a house in Windsor. I really like it here, it is quiet, people are kind and the cheap cost of living takes away the “money” stress that I was used to when living in Toronto. I plan on staying here for a long time.

This year I want to:

• Help kids in my community
• Exercise regularly
• Eat healthy
• Make small monthly goals

This month’s small goals:

1. Restart this blog. [X]
2. Go to trampoline fitness class ( Jan 9,16, 18, 23, 25, 30)
3. Focus eating a healthy breakfast every day.
4. Eye test. (I keep putting this off) I’m outta contacts and I’m not letting myself order any until I get this done.
5. Start Pokerstars Spin and Go bankroll buildup

The last couple year’s I’ve barely played any poker. I kept saying I was going to start playing but it just kept becoming not as important as the other stuff in my life that was going on. This year I’m going to work towards being a good “rec” player with a goal of 1000 spin and goes a month. Starting with $119.83 US playing $3 spin and goes, let’s see how fast I can move up stakes.

Good luck to everyone in 2018. ❤

 

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I miss the poker world – My build-up to Vegas/weight loss challenge

So I’ve kept my head down, got my life together and dealt with some depression and anxiety issues and now I feel better than I ever have. Well almost better. Dealing with mental health issues like depression is draining. For me it meant, getting on the right medicine and cognitive-behavioral therapy and disappearing. Whenever I fall into depression I gain a lot of weight. Last year I gained a whopping 42lbs. Crazy I know. My first reaction was to hate myself for doing that to my body, but I don’t. Not even a little bit. I did what was best for my mind and at the time it came with some weight gain. It has given me a goal.

I started my weight loss journey January 1st and I’ve already lost 22 lbs. I’m doing a form of a keto diet + some additional restrictions. Now that I’m in a routine with 0 cheating. I’m adding in my next goal.

A bankroll challenge for myself. Well not really a bankroll challenge, more like a get my ass to Vegas this summer challenge. I’m going to start this with $100 US and play the hero games on partypoker.com .  Why those games? Because they are crazy soft. Throughout my challenge, I am going to be giving myself some tier goals to keep it fun. However, if I don’t lose the rest of the weight I gained (20lbs) by June then I won’t be going to Vegas and that would be a shame.

My first tier goal (I’m calling it the bottom of the barrel tier) is $885 US that would be 7 days/airfare and hotel staying in old Vegas.I’ll be starting this March 1st.

I’ll be starting this March 1st.

My bankroll guidelines will be:

I really just want to bring the reason that I started playing poker back into my life and that is because I loved the game.

I have a lot of other goals that I want to get done this year. I’m adding them in slowly to build up routines but I am pretty sure it is going to be a crazy productive year for me.

The cloud of depression.

If there was one thing in this world, I was afraid of, it was falling back into depression. That fear consumed me, the paranoia of everything that I would lose again. The career that you worked so hard on lost overnight. The people that you shutout vanished. Each time it happened you pulled yourself up and re-invented yourself. A new you, a new place, a new job, new friends, new hair but always something missing.

It took me a long time to understand what was missing. I was so consumed with the fear of losing everything again that it controlled me. What was the point in wanting when if you got it, it could be gone overnight? Then it happened, I fell back into a deep depression, but this story isn’t about that, it is about what happened next.

It was eye opening. I was able to feel excited.

The gray skies in my head started to clear the clouds parted and that cloud of depression changed into a rainbow of hope. Trust in friends and family, excitement for what is to come next, but most importantly, that I’m allowed to want, and that I deserve to want more.

Today is Bell Let’s Talk Day #BellLetsTalk get in the conversation.

For those of you that know someone that deals with depression. It is something that takes a lot of energy to get through, but it can also be a blessing. Surrounded by the right people and by getting the correct help, depression has helped me remove the things that were useless. I said goodbye clutter in my life, like the career I never really wanted or the people that drained me. What I’m left with is a bubble of people that are motivating, they make me a better person and that gives me the worth to want more.

 

I Am Stronger Because I Post

Every time I post I feel stronger, in control, motivated, but most importantly I feel hope. I normally post after I feel sad, not today! This last month has been amazing. From visits from my family, hosting a Halloween get together last night and working towards my goals. Every puzzle piece seems to be fitting into place even if I have to force it. I feel healthier, stronger, but most important I am happy.

My first weight loss challenge is almost over, with one week to go I have stopped losing weight the last little while. I am not sure if it is because I have been working out and have gained from that or if my diet is missing something. I am going to be working my ass off this next week, hoping to still make my goal. I guess it is time to step up that Cardio as well as going to my kickboxing class. I was fairly good with what I ate the last few weeks, but I could still improve on my healthy meals. 

Last night I hosted a Halloween Masquerade Party and had a well-deserved cheat day, even as a cheat day I still paid attention to what I was eating as I didn’t want to go crazy and ruin the work on myself that I have done.

Still being fairly new to Montreal and I don’t know that many people. This made it more important to me to share a fun night with the amazing friends that I have made so far here in Montreal. Halloween is my favorite time of the year and that made it the perfect time to invite them over.

WPT Montreal is coming to Playground Poker in November. I am looking forward to playing two side events. Event The Wild $150 with a 100k guaranteed and the $250 Frenzy a 200K guaranteed prize pool.

This next month my main focus is on my health, losing weight and getting toned. Secondary focus will be working on my PLO game and third will be a creative activity for my mind that is yet to be determined, any suggestions?

If anyone has some healthy tips to help me with my goals or PLO please share them with me or if you post about how blogging has helped you let me know so I can follow your blog.

Everything You Do Can Lead To Something New.

The other day I took my first trampoline fitness class at Rebound Fitness. I was a little early and walked into this big loft building looking extremely lost. As I stared at the building directory trying to figure out where I was suppose to be a man stopped and asked me if I what company I was looking for. When I told him he told me that he showed me where my class was and told me that he was the owner of H2O MMA and they have a kickboxing class that I might be interested in and should come for the free session.

I actually did take one class about a year ago, but the pace was way too fast and I was extremely intimidated as most of the class was filled with guys that use that class as a part of their routine. I told him I would still come and check it out after my class.

The trampoline class was amazing. If you have ever taken a Power class before that is what this was but with a mix of the trampoline for added cardio. I was pretty nasty sweaty by the end of the class and still committed myself to skipping the bus and taking that 30 minute walking home. On the way out of class I went down and peeked in the H2O MMA gym. This place looked amazing. I wrote down the website.

On my walk home it got dark really fast. I had to cross train tracks that I don’t even remember crossing on my way to the class. I walked up to the flashing red lights and waited for the train to finish crossing. It seemed like an hour, I started to feel a little nervous as it hit me that I probably shouldn’t have been walking home that late at night alone.

When I got home, I took a look at the website.

“Women’s Only Kickboxing Bootcamp workouts are the best around at H2O Gym Montreal. Whether you want to learn self-defense, lose weight, improve cardio & fitness, or just sculpt your body, this class will do it for you. This is a safe, friendly, non-competitive class, designed for beginners, where learning and supporting each others goals is always #1.”

Add another class to my schedule. I am sold! Not only am I sold I am really excited about this class.

Had I not signed up for that trampoline class, I would have never come across the kickboxing class. Who knows what that kickboxing class will lead me to. Worst case I wasted an hour on something I don’t like or I make new friends, lose some weight while learning how to protect myself. After that, my new kickboxing class could lead to something else… Maybe Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu?